It is hard to understand the effect that grief and loss can have until you experience the loss of something or someone particularly important. The grief and loss counselors at Psych Blossom say that you can be sympathetic to others who are experiencing grief, but until you go through it yourself, it can be very difficult to really comprehend what it feels like. Moreover, because it affects everyone in different ways, there is no way to know how you will react if someone close to you dies.

What are the Symptoms of Grief and Loss?

There are a variety of symptoms associated with grief and while you may experience many of them, you could be someone who is affected by just one type of symptom. The reality is that how you feel when dealing with grief can be completely different to how someone else feels. No one should tell you that the way you are feeling is right or wrong. Below are some of the more common symptoms associated with grief and loss:

• Numbness or shock.

Some people will experience a feeling of shock upon hearing about the death of a loved one. They often describe feeling nothing as they struggle to come to terms with what has happened.

• Anger.

It is not uncommon to feel angry with the person who has died or with the way in which they died.

• Sadness.

An intense sense of loss and sadness can cause emotional outbursts and a lot of sobbing. Some people find that they are unable to stop crying every time they think about the person who has died.

• Depression.

Depression often follows sadness as the reality of life without a loved one begins to hit home.

• Guilt.

Guilt can be a very strong emotion felt by those who experience loss, especially about things they said or did not say when the person was alive.

Ways to Deal with Grief and Loss

The most important thing to remember when dealing with the loss of a loved one is that how you feel is how you feel. There is nothing you can do about how you feel, and you don’t have to change it for anyone else. You also need to remember to take one day at a time. Just because you feel okay one day, does not mean that you are better. Grief can hit you hard out of the blue. Even if you have been coping okay for weeks, it might just take hearing a special song or seeing something that brings back a precious memory for you to feel as though you are right back at the beginning again.

You might have some well-meaning individuals telling you to get help for depression because you are struggling to get over your feelings. But grief can take a long time to pass, and it is not abnormal to feel grief for months, or even years.

There are things that you can do to help, though. For example, try to spend time with supportive individuals who will not judge you for being sad or tell you it is time to move on. You might find that you are not hungry or that you cannot sleep, but it is important to get rest and to eat. If you are really struggling with eating and sleeping, talk to your doctor. They may be able to prescribe something to help relax you.

Accept the feelings as they come and try not to pigeonhole yourself into feeling a certain way. Different feelings will come and go; the best thing to do is embrace them.